He storms beaches with a sword, an archery champion, charges German soldiers on a motorcycle, reenlists in the army at middle-age because he’s bored, wins a few medals, escapes two concentration camps, paratroops into Palestine, does some male modeling, plays bagpipes, and surfs. No I’m not talking about Chuck Norris’s or even Rambo’s grandfather.
‘Mad Jack’ Churchill. One of the coolest men to ever live. He was a British soldier who fought in WWII armed with his trusty longbow, bagpipes, and a Scottish broadsword. When asked why a sword in the day of guns he replied, “any officer who goes into action without his sword is improperly dressed.” But not to be outdone by his own mere blade, the man is known for the last recorded bow and arrow killing in action by shooting a German NCO n 1940.
After the battle of Dunkirk, Mad Jack joined the Commandos without knowing what they did but because it sounded like fun. As the ramps fell from his landing craft, he leaped forward playing ‘March of the Cameron Men’ on his pipes before throwing a grenade and running straight into the battle screaming “Commandoooo!”. Needless to say, the Germans were taken aback. Mad Jack and his 50 men took 136 prisoners that day. Not long after that, he single-handedly took 42 German prisoners and captured a mortar crew using only his broadsword and a patrolling guard as a human shield. When asked how he managed this:
“I maintain that as long as you tell a German loudly and clearly what to do, if you are senior to him he will cry yes sir and get on with it enthusiastically and efficiently whatever the situation.”
Even after retirement the man’s eccentricity could not be stopped. Each day on his train ride home, he’d throw his briefcase out the window. He merely explained that he was simply tossing it into his own back garden so he wouldn’t have to carry it from the station.